In the Presence of Heroes

A street in Antsirabe

Saturday, 5 August 2023 (173)

I decided this morning I'd be staying another night at Loavsoa here in Antsirabe. This morning was a repeat of last evening only I did a little preparation and had a plan and material to give. Had about 7 or 8 students. It could not have gone over better and I finished the 2 hours with a real reason to fight to be moved here.

I was honest with Eleonore that this has the potential of changing my desire to leave. I gained more out of these two session teaching than they could possibly have gained but I gather by the feedback that this is not the case. This feels and looks exactly like I imagined being in the Peace Corps should but it's not my full-time role yet.

Samson and I met up with Nada from Manadona and had lunch and hung out playing pool and catching up. Even she is struggling a little with language.

One of the students at ECA

Sunday, 6 August 2023 (174)

Had the opportunity to attend the Antsirabe branch sacrament meeting. They have a very nice church building here. Very big. I was late and walked into the back of the chapel and found a seat when within a minute two individuals came up to speak to me. We walked outside and talked, 1/4 Malagasy, 3/4 English. One of the gentlemen was the elder's quorum president and also a photographer. He asked if I could help teach English at an English club/class on Saturday's here. I explained that could be difficult with my other ECA teaching but possible if we worked out a good time.

I imagine what it could be like to live here, teach English at ECA and attend this branch. It seems so exciting and yet I knew it would require a miracle to happen. It would very much add to my interests to teach and make a greater impact here than in Sahanivotry.

On the Taxibruss back to site I came up with some ideas how we might make that miracle happen. If not, I’ll likely find myself leaving in September as currently planned. The idea is to write a good letter to the new country director. And appeal for the change not just based on my desire but also based on health, nutrition, water problems (that 12 day stretch with no water) and for religious reasons. I know if it was a security issue they would do it immediately but this is not just a move but a move to another sector. It is a very long shot.

Back from Antsirabe about 12:30. I found the door open and Salva nowhere to be found. He may have been just a couple doors away but I was here for 20 minutes or more before he even noticed I was back. That doesn't bode well for his keeping my place locked and secured. And Dobby had no water or food. And the food that was available looked depleted more than necessary which could mean he has been feeding her more than she needs and instead the chickens or other dogs come and eat it.

I did solve the headphone mystery. I mentioned how someone had taken my headphones and he said no, they are in my co-workers place. OK. But they didn't ask for permission. It looks like there are teeth marks on them so Dobby could have brought them outside but that still doesn't explain why the weren't brought back. It's complicated I'm sure.

Monday, 7 August 2023 (175)

Letter I sent to the new Country Director:

Dear Mariah:

First off, thank you for all you do for the staff, the volunteers, and the people of Madagascar. I am sure you will never receive the appropriate appreciation from any of us. And thank you for the many complicated issues you decide. Unfortunately, I may be bringing you one of those in this letter – with a possible fix.

I am currently your oldest PCV at 63, serving as a health Volunteer in Sahanivotry, about 1.5 hours south of Antsirabe. I wish I could report all is well here but there are a few complications I am having. 

First, I am struggling very much with the language – like all PCV’s but worse perhaps. I do have a tutor, but it is not improving. You likely already know I tested at Intermediate Low, and worked very hard at it, still do. Yes, I can survive, buy things, yes - I can hold basic conversations but no - I cannot fully function in health topics. I can read it; I can present badly but it is very difficult to connect or even understand others.

Other issues: Sahanivotry is a very tiny community, and officially my supervisor (Dr. Clertant) has asked that I be here only two mornings a week. One of those two mornings are so slow that even the interns find themselves playing games to pass the time. 

My diet is unusual, and I am having a difficult time finding potatoes, eggs or even bread here - even on market days. I’m not a vegetable eater and do not buy the local meat. I generally need to stock up in Antsirabe on weekends.

Water can be infrequent here. I reported a month back when we had no water for a 12-day stretch. Fortunately, I can purchase water and do store backup water. Also, as a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (Mormon) I have been unable to attend many Sundays and know that has taken a toll on me mentally and spiritually. The closest church is very far away – there’s a branch in Antsirabe. And there has been some health-related issues that could be helped by a better diet. I was just recently in Tana for 10 days with a bacterial infection as you probably already know.

As an older volunteer I had hoped to serve in a greater capacity than I currently am. I do other things in and for my community, but I have been counseled not to paint so much, repair things at the CSB and so forth. It sets a bad precedence, but I find enormous value in feeling helpful through that.

I also produce many videos as I have a YouTube Channel you may have heard about (Madagascar Adventure https://www.youtube.com/@MadAdventure) where I am trying to tell many of the stories of the Peace Corps experience but specifically moving towards more about the people and their lives here in Madagascar. I brought four cameras, and this is what I did in many countries around the world as a profession. You may have seen the “Day in the Life” Video I just put online https://youtu.be/qUFwdAA54dc. Amanda, and the doctors have asked if I could assist in some videos on the reality of site living as well as wound care (to name two). I’m all for helping in those ways and have all the gear and computing power to do so. 

Here's the fix.

Of late, I have connected with the ECA school in Antsirabe where there has been English teaching PCV’s for the last 30 years when they helped establish that association. I have been working with Eleo Raharimiadane (Michell Bontrager’s supervisor) and all their staff and have taught on several occasions trying to assist them and pick up a bit of the gap since Michell left there a month ago. I cannot express how rewarding and helpful they and I feel about that opportunity. I did talk with Tovo over Health and asked for official permission, and he said if I didn’t need reimbursement, could do it on weekends, and didn’t tell my health supervisor it would be ok.

But the reality is, I love it. It is truly so much closer to the ideal of doing what I had hoped to do through Peace Corps service. These students are older teens and mostly adults at ECA with advanced English skills already. A minimum of Malagasy is required. 

Staff and policy may be that I haven’t been trained in Peace Corps English teaching methods. 

I am a professional teacher. 

I have a degree in Instructional science, just shy of a master’s in mass communications. I taught English writing classes, library research, and software / computers at Brigham Young University for several years. For years I produced videos for textbook publishers, taught safety, education and yes, medical health. Three months of Peace Corps teaching classes does not a teacher make - but a lifetime of teaching is a pretty good resume. My last job before retiring was as a job coach / trainer and those skills are also helpful here. In fact, Peace Corps originally had me pegged to teach literacy in Samoa. 

ECA is currently working on submitting a letter from their staff saying they have seen me teach and are impressed with my ability, as well as my motivating energy and enthusiasm for the subject. They like me and I love them and the students I have met. They also informed me that Zanoa from ECA had tentatively spoken with Eddie about switching me to English teaching, and they were not opposed to it but that it would also be dependent on the health people.

Let me say – I understand the Peace Corps experience for PCV’s isn’t always what we want it to be. We do small things, have small influences, do things that don’t seem important, don’t always change lives except over time and because of our attitudes, doggedness and just continually plugging away at what is a sometimes-difficult lifestyle. I get that and know I will and can make a difference wherever I serve. I serve at the Peace Corps pleasure.

But I am very frustrated mentally and physically, very unhappy, and very much feeling like ET-ing because at my age, I see many more rewarding opportunities to volunteer back in the states. But every time I walk away from teaching at ECA – I am truly happy. I feel I’ve touched lives. I feel it so much more is in doing what I am here to do, and what the Peace Corps would like me to do here, more than with my current role as a health volunteer. In health - I can’t communicate, I can’t connect, I can’t teach, and I don’t see a future there. And moving to Antsirabe in this role would likely solve or at least improve most of the other issues I am having at my site – health, dietary, mental, and spiritual, a real lack of purpose.

I would be happy to connect with my supervisor / doctor here and get his perspective and explain more fully to him if that would be helpful. We have had a few conversations (through my tutor) where these frustrations and limitations have been brought up. Also, with IST coming up – perhaps I could get a quick course in teaching English the Peace Corps way to help ease anyone who thinks I could use it. As well as take the opportunity to show my teaching abilities to the PC English teaching staff.

Realistically, I assume changing roles is near impossible except under extenuating circumstances. I am trying to convey those circumstances. Ultimately, I trust the Peace Corps and your decision in the end. I believe we all end up where we should be and doing what is in our best interest and in the best interest of those we serve. Again, thank you for hearing me out. I just want to love the people of Madagascar and serve them in ways that I feel I am best equipped to do. This service is an amazing adventure, and I wouldn’t have it any other way – unless it served the people, and the Peace Corps goals better. 

Thank You for your consideration,

Rick Porter

Tuesday, 8 August 2023 (176)

As I stood amidst the mothers and their babies this morning at the CSB, I realized how privileged I was - but not as you would think. Instead, I was surrounded by heroes. Mothers. They are the ones who should be given most of the credit -for raising their children, for teaching them to be good, to do good. All that is great and wonderful in this world is because mothers taught it to their children. In this land especially, where it is harder to live to adulthood - the baby survives, grows from infant, child, teen, and adult - because the mothers give them their all. They are the real heroes of this world.

And I get to weigh their babies.

And hand out vaccine books. I think it is an amusing highlight for them to hear me mangle their names. Everyone seems to get a laugh out of it. 

The first day ever I did not go to the market. I didn't need anything. 

Taught English to 8 or 9 this evening. Teaching is maybe not the appropriate word. We had some materials I had prepared and I have the word flash cards as a backup. That's pretty basic for people who know very little. They took notes and I'll really have to prepare if I keep doing this. There's quite a big difference between this kind of teaching and what is expected of me in Antsirabe.

I got an email from Mariah Cisse, our new country director. She acknowledged getting the letter and wanted to set up a time to talk on Friday morning. It sounds like more than a no which could have been conveyed by Amanda or someone else in the chain of command. Likely, she will grill me as to the extenuating circumstances. I'd hate to have to lie and say circumstances are worse than they really are but if there are no serious issues here I doubt there's any chance of a change.

I believe it is a win / win situation. I move and change roles; move to Antsirabe and stay longer - happily. OR I get a no and might as well go home before IST so I don't poison the well with any pessimistic ideas I have. Plus what good would it do me to go through more health training if I just leave a week or two later.

Personally, I don't think the move and change will happen. I think it is too much of a problem, a bad precedence and too difficult for the Peace Corps to approve unless it was for security, or life and death reasons. I expect they will say no after further questioning. And if I was them, what evidence is there that I would stay, or for how long with these changes. They might want some guarantees - I would. I can only think that I would give it more time and see what happens. But with a hard no - I will likely accept a departure before IST.